Never

You never waited for me
I was never the one for you
I was never the one you wanted
If there’s one thing I’ll regret
Is me never trying to find out
Why we treated the way we did each other
In those months
I cried nights
And woke up cold-hearted
It won’t be my regret over how I made you wait
What did you wait for?
Was I your catalyst?
I was merely a throwaway
For all the heart that I gave away
My heart was lost in all that you misunderstood
In all that went unsaid
I can never convince you
And you could never convince me
That you truly cared for me
Or that you truly loved me
Did you take the time to know me
Or believe me for the heart even in the mess that I was
What were you waiting for
You used me well didn’t you
I used to feel the things
That I never thought I’d have to feel
Who did I cry over
Why did I cry over
Disrespect and injustice
In the contact that was ours
Severed connections
And misplaced words
Our conversations never solved anything
I thank you for hurting me
I thank you for breaking me
I love you still
I hate how I love you
And even when I’ll be put down again
Surely soon
May I never harbour bitterness
May I forget all that happened along the way
I wish for your joy
I wish for your peace
You’ll find your way
Here in the waiting
And hopefully so will I

last edited 4 April, 2018