Perpetual

I’m sorry I’m pointing to you 

As the source of my stress 

But your stress takes me back to a place

Where I want to scream so loud 

At you 

At myself 

Do you know how hard we made it for ourselves 

What were you so afraid of

Some days you were so embracing 

And on other days 

Your expectations would soar above 

Every thread of my abilities 

Frayed by insecurity 

Frayed by unbelief 

I am nothing 

I was no better then 

I am no better now 

But I can only remember 

How difficult it was then 

How nothing seems to have changed

A perpetual sense of hopelessness 

I suppose I haven’t grown