Just Because

If you miss you out on every word I say
Please don’t deafen your ears
When I let you know
That I love you

Am I a hypocrite?
My mind’s sure
That I cry because of you
But here I am to you 
Having a share of problems 
Just like you
Little do you know – 
Why tears fall from these eyes -
That are merciless enough
To look away
How long will I stay silent?
But I don’t want to bother you
I don’t want to be 
As insensitive as you are
To your sense of worth
With Him in me
I could never stop caring for you
But I want to stop
Allowing myself to feel this hurt
I want to stop allowing you to mistreat me
This way
I want to stop allowing myself to feel
This stinging hurt
That will pass untouched
This hurt
That you’ll never know
No one will ever know
I am longing to show love to you
But the soul in my actions
Undeniably says otherwise
I must be a hypocrite

Do I really have love in my heart?
Why can’t I see beyond this hurt?
Why can’t I be gracious to your lying,
Your stubborn confidence
Where you find your safe place
Grace only grace
Why can’t I give you what He gave to me
The way He did 
The rush with which He did
Grace