My Choices

"My Choices" was one of the topics for the Inter-house Poetry Competition for this year. Thank-you to Archana for inspiring the thought-process :')

The magic of pervasiveness
I feel the weight of my choices
Weighing out my chances
My chances to free you
From their judgment
You're an exhibit in their eyes
They all think they know you like I do
I have my love for you
I will choose to love you
Till what becomes the end of you
A friend I wished I had never known
But I am moved
Wrongly and rightly
The burden of being responsible
For every action and word
Directed towards you
Implored by you
My choices
Are a magic of pervasiveness
Affecting all of me
Stealing my breath
I can't see
To what I'm holding onto so tightly
It's a miracle
I don't bleed
In all this darkness
In the midst of all this hurt and strife
Dying to explain myself to you
Dying to make you understand
You're all I've got
I have only you
This is a pained choice
To stay
I couldn't run away even if I wanted to
But that's what you do
Always running away from me
After you tell me that I am loved
and dear to you
Tell me again
Why don't I bleed
At least I'd feel differently
Than from the sting
Of invisible wounds
Forming unsaid
Forming by choice
I inflict pain upon myself
It is in my heart
It is in my hands
But I will choose to love you
Even if it hurts me
Choose to uplift you
And repeatedly let you know
Those things that you're moved to forget
In the light of your choices
Please help me with myself
I can't get past caring for you
Time and again
I've told myself
I'd free myself from you
But I can't
Choosing liberty -
Help me to
Is that what'll help you?