Hyperventilating

We are losing our breath
Over comfort
Over vitamins
We are merely a breath
Losing out on our thoughts
My mind is clouded
This fault that is mine
Does it have to -
Always be mine?
I can't come to you
I couldn't possibly
How you all
Skillfully fill my story
With blame
I don't blame you
For blaming me
Please show me how I'm wrong
I don't know how to come to you
I love you dearly
I'd give anything
For us to be as we were
Because you see
I'm so tired of this air
I'm so tired of carrying it around
You started to act so strange
It was you
I tried as little as I did
I tried
But you kept away
Looked away
As if I wasn't around
Spoke of me
Like I wasn't to be spoken to directly
I'm praying for opened eyes
What have I done now?
I am strife
Moved to struggle
Take away the bitterness
Humble me
Till I'm down at my feet
Loving close
Loving freely
Without a trace of remembrance
Of how you've made me feel
With tears in my eyes
I wait for you to come to me
I wait for myself to go to you
I've fed myself enough
With repeated experiences
To sickeningly help me
To respond the same every time
Staying away
And hoping for things to change
When will I learn
That there is healing
In humility
In forgiveness
How could this love be true
There is no fear in love
But I do
I truly love you
Please forgive me
Please forgive me