Respect

Can I come to you
When I know who I am in Him?
Until then
Let's stop
Unrealistically expecting
Out of pride
For reconciliation
From my side
I'm not running away from you
I just need some time for myself
When did you ever tell me
That it was all okay?
How was I supposed to know
That it was all okay
I didn't expect you to come to me
But how else will I know for sure?
What is it that you want from me?
How could you possibly wait for me - 
In your justification, 
In your defence
As if I'm not worthy 
Of having my heart respected
I don't understand any of it
Time and again
I find myself here
Disrespected
Stood to stand in shame before you
Named unworthy
By your side of the story
While my side of the story
Remains untold and lost in my tears
In my silence
I can't even bring myself 
To raise my eyes